Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
