isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
