dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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