I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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