you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Everyone says I win the strip club
Randomize
