I just made out with a guy for $7.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
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last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
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He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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