I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
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hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
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you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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