sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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