did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
