Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
