did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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