problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
