How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
