I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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