Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
