people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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