Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
