Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
