Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
My bed is full of blood and feathers
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Randomize
