Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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