i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
