yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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