that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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