ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
