She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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