im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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