she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
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i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
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I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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