I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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