I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize