did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
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yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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