So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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