did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
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No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Someone signed my nipple.
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