Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
