Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
