I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
