I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
