What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
he fucked my hip out of place.
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We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
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All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
These tits shall not be calmed
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize