Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
