Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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