i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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