I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
