So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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