You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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