My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
