you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
