that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
