You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize