Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
