I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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