She's JV to your varsity
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
