He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
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no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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